The congregation stood up and clapped their hands. Barnes, would you please come down in front and tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world? He found his way to the menswear department where a young lady offered to help him.
Quiero calcetines," said the man. Quiero calcetines," repeated the man. We have some fine pants on this rack," offered the salesgirl. Quiero calcetines," insisted the man. Quiero calcetines," the man repeated. As they passed the underwear counter, the man spotted a display of socks and happily grabbed a pair. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot? I'm a defective parrot. You can't see it because of my feathers.
I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion. Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humour, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes, "Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing.
Then he continued taking off the nightie! I got a hard-on and fell off my perch! At first, it sounds like a great idea. But then you're on your knees in the living room, with a mess on the carpet, wishing you'd have just paid someone.
Suddenly, she sneezes, and a glass eye comes flying out of her eye socket. It hurls by the man, and he snatches it from the air and hands it back to her.
Let me buy dinner to make it up to you. May I join you? The woman is a stimulating conversationalist, stunning pretty, and the man finds they have a lot in common. He gets her phone number and asks. Are you this nice to every guy you meet? Anti vaxx joke When little Timmy went to school and mastered one to nine, he thought the other kids were cool and every class Devine.
A young man robbed a bank wearing a suit made of many mirrors, but he turned himself in after taking some time to reflect. Luckily, the judge was lenient… …as he saw a lot of himself in the young man. My wisdom will kill me one day I went to the liquor store yesterday on my bicycle, bought a bottle of whisky and put it in the bicycle basket As I was about to leave, I thought to myself that if I fell off the bicycle, the bottle would break.
I'm not shaking hands because everyone is out of toilet paper. Have you ever tried to eat a clock? Its very time consuming. A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative for a large firm. I was halfway out the door with the TV before I realized it was my place. And before I broke in, I used to stand outside and case the joint. Finally, I said, "Damn, this brother will never come home!
More jokes about: drug , life. More jokes about: doctor , life , money , time. Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed. More jokes about: Chuck Norris , fitness , life. Life is an open door. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
More jokes about: Chuck Norris , life , science. Me: What do you call someone who isn't sure if they like egg nog or not? Wife: What? Me: An Eggnogstic. Wife: This is grounds for divorce.
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